Maybe This Time

So, I have sat down three times in the last two days to write out a blog. Life has been crazy, and we have been running like mad. In fact, since Friday I have had to fill up my van 3 times now. I have been to OKC and back, Yukon and back three times, and to OKC and back again. It's made for a lot of time on the road, very few bathroom breaks, and a good chunk of money out of our account due to the gas prices.

One might ask why so many trips. There really is no simple answer. We have had to get my husband a suit for my sister's wedding, a urologist appointment, and visits to the kid's doctor are just a few of the things. I talked about our appointments on Friday in my last blog.

On Monday I woke up and noticed that Samuel was sounding worse. I called in, and the nurse there told me we could bring him in, but there was a long wait. She also informed me that there were a lot of people with the flu in that day. We decided it would be best not to expose either of them to the flu and wait until his scheduled Well Baby check up yesterday. That appointment determined that Genevieve would not have surgery due to still being congested, and that Samuel had RSV. We were given meds, a nebulizer, and sent home (he has a great O2 sat, and he has no fever).

I wonder how many of us think about how busy we are. Sometimes I wonder what I would do if I had nothing at all to even think about. The other night a really bad storm came through at about 3 am. I was woken up by the loud thunder. I also thought that I heard the tornado alarm, but after checking out the TV, I realized it was just a really bad storm.

About that time Samuel woke up too. I picked him up and came out to the living room to nurse him. As I was nursing him it hit me...I am someone's mom. Not only am I one someone's mom, but I am a mom to two. Now maybe it was the time of the night and that I was out of it, but I did a lot of thinking. I wondered how I had all of a sudden become a mom. Now I have been a mom for over 2 years now, so it didn't JUST happen. And before I get comments on how I became a mom, I do know where babies come from. In that moment it just felt like there had been a time jump in my life. You know, the kind of jumps that happen in movies. The movie is going on, and all of a sudden they take you to the here and now. You thought you were in that time to start off with, but you realize they were just thinking back. That was how I felt at that time. I felt like my life was going along, and all of a sudden there was a time jump like I was just thinking back.

Maybe I'm the only one who has had a mini freak out like that. I guess sometimes it is hard for me to believe that I'm actually grown, married, and have kids. I am going to blame how fast life has seemed to be going by recently. Funny how when we are kids it seems like it takes forever for our birthday and holidays, but as you get older, they come faster and faster every year. I wonder if it is just because we don't look forward to them as much as we did as kids, or if it is something else. This whole experience the other night made me realize that I need to slow down more (if that is even possible) and take things in.

All of this reminds me of a song on one of my favorite CDs. I love this CD because of when I first heard it in my life. The CD is THE CALL by Anointed. When my Mom had just finished cancer treatment, my cousin came and stayed with us. We stayed up late, made stupid movies, and all the fun things that kids in their teens do. This CD was her's, and I use to listen to it a lot. When I went to church camp, she let me take it with me. She took it home at the end of the summer, but the songs on that CD stayed with me enough that I had to get it myself. I pull it out often and listen to it. I don't know if it is because of what it reminds me of, or if it is the fact that every time I listen to it something speaks to me.

One of the songs called GOTTA LOVE IT talks about how we need to remember that life here is a gift. Everything in our way and our trials and troubles can make us long for heaven. What we have to remember is that we are living in God's gift, and we should take time to enjoy the time we have here. I guess when I heard the song I realized how busy I have been and how I should slow down a bit. I should take some time to enjoy my life here on Earth. If you have time to check out the CD, you totally should. Like I said, it probably just means a lot to me because of when I first heard it, but I have to say I keep that one in my CD player almost all the time. I'm going to challenge myself to take time, slow down, and enjoy life more. The laundry can wait a day (or forever :p ).