Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Just Another Cryptic Week

So I know some of you also follow me on my Facebook account. I have been very cryptic for a week or so, and I am sorry I haven't spilled the beans. You know I really wanted to, but I hate when you say something then have to take it all back. So here is me spilling the beans.

I was presented with a chance to do something awesome this week. The people who oversee our MOPS group want to send two people to the convention this year. The only stipulation is that one of the two has to take the coordinator's place when she leaves. There was already one woman who said she'd love to go, and she was sure she'd step into that role. I thought that it would be awesome to go as well. I have really been into MOPS since I was pregnant with Samuel. I found a group in Oklahoma, and fell in love with the idea of the group and the group I had itself. Ever since, I have done more and more with the group. I am taking over a leadership role this next year, and I love giving what I have to that group. There is nothing like moms who are where you are in your life getting together to fellowship. It hasn't been 100% approved for me to go yet, but I have everything in place for it to happen (the current coordinator is on vacation and not able to be online every day right now).

Anyway, it took a lot of prayer and planning. I sure didn't have any hand in it. I know that God was taking care of it all for me. A friend of ours totally stepped up and did more than a friend should. She is taking in my kids for the days that I am gone. What a blessing that is. Not only that, I found out my whole trip will be paid for. This will be the first flight I have made without the kids. It will be awesome! I can't wait to build on who I am as a person and not just me being mom. It has been so hard for me to keep my identity, and I have failed miserably. I feel so bad for letting it get that far, but I have. I know I'm not the first, and I know I won't be the last. This is just one chance I have to get to know myself again and to be just me.

Today has been a day of ah ha God moments. I realized that the Bible Study I am in is totally what I need to be hearing right now. I find it funny because it seems like every time I take a new study, it is meeting me where I am in life and speaking to my heart. I have taken studies on worrying, being a submissive wife (I actually liked that one a lot), book of John, and this recent one is on friendship. I think it is funny how something just as small as friendship could speak to you.

We have only done two lessons, and I can't believe what all I have learned about myself. I realized in the first session that I don't have very many close friends. I have surface friends, but when it comes to those friends who know the good, bad and the ugly of Emily...there aren't a lot. I use to think it was because I moved a lot as a child and now as an adult. However, I'm not so sure it is that way. I have a few friends that I think I could tell anything to, go to the with anything I need, etc and I could count on them. Most people I wouldn't. I have a hard time telling things about myself and going on with most of my "friends." I always figure that you know who your close friends are when you move. The close friends make an effort (and I do too) to stay connected even though you are in totally other parts of the world. Those friends that are just around...you loose touch with them real quick.

Anyway, I don't need to go on and on tonight. It is getting late, and I have to get up and get things ready for Samuel's speech therapy appointment tomorrow morning. Just keep praying that everything else falls into place for the MOPS trip. I would love to head to Nashville for a few days this fall. It will be holy jet lag for just the few days I will be there, but what an awesome experience.

No comments: